Once again...

Once again it's been a long time since I posted anything.  We have been busy with homeschooling stuff and just daily life.  Big Daddy has been out of town a lot, (this is the third week in a row) but he's home every weekend.  We have been playing in the sprinklers, and going to Nana and Paw Paw's a lot in the evenings.  It just seems like more fun to play outside when there's more people around.  And my brother-in-law made these:

(pictures are sideways but I don't know why!)

a tire swing

and a big 2 person swing !

 My parents (and sister) live on family land that once belonged to my great grandparents.  The house that my dad grew up in is right next door.  My grandmother passed away nearly two years ago and my dad bought the house recently.  There are several old maple trees, so my brother-in-law fixed swings for the girls (Callie, Maggie & Ellie) in one of them.  These swings are in the tree that my grandparents used to sit under all the time...and my dad probably played under them when he was little too.  This is now our evening hangout!

Big Daddy and I celebrated our twelve year wedding anniversary this past weekend.  I still can't believe that I've been married that long or that I was so young when I married!  We had an all day date that lasted about eight hours.  We had a light lunch, saw a movie, shopped, walked around, had dinner and then walked around before wandering home.  Maggie and Ellie spent the day with my sister and my mom. Since they live next to each other, the girls just sort of float back and forth.

And that is a little bit of what's going on around here!

Challenges

I thought being a mom was hard, but being a homeschool mom is so much harder.

Going to the beach and having it rain three out of four days was not always easy.  Fortunately, I am blessed with two girls that love staying in hotels and the sun popped out long enough each day for us to enjoy the sand, water and to explore.  

Being "single" again after several weeks of not being single is tough...and lonely.

Starting a diet right after a birthday party when there's left over cupcakes in the house is hard.  Thankfully, I have lost two pounds in the past two days and feel slightly encouraged.

Seeing these two smiley faces makes everything seem better.

Right Now

It has been three years since we woke up here and not there.  Maggie has officially lived here for as long as she lived in Sanford.

I have a polyp growing my uterus.  It hurts sometimes.

We are looking forward to going to the beach soon.

Big Daddy and I are really enjoying our first year of being the proud owners of a blooming hydrangea!  (It was my Mother's Day present last year)  Hydrangeas remind me of my Grandma's house and the place where Big Daddy and I spent our honeymoon and many summer weekends in the first few years of our marriage.  I have little bouquets scattered through the house.

We are all sorts of excited about an Ice Cream Social with our homeschool group to celebrate the end of the school year.

We are still talking about the fun trip we took last week to have dinner with our friends in Sanford. Maggie and Ellie were able to love on Gammy Gladys and play with their friends, while I had some much needed time with my favorite mommies.

Ellie loves her homeschool preschool time.

Big Daddy and I are planning a little trip for our twelve year anniversary that's coming up.

Awesome Randomness

The weeks just seem to fly by in-between posts these days! My days are full with housework, schoolwork and little girls to play with and then the evenings are for playing outside or cuddling on the couch and watching a movie. After the girls are in bed I can usually be found folding laundry or pretending to be a vegetable.

• Sometimes I feel like I am lacking in the friend department, so one of the happiest parts of the past week was when I went to our former town and had lunch with my awesome mommy-friends, A & K. I feel blessed to have great on-line friends, great old friends that I know I could call if I needed anything and only see once a year, church friends that I teach beside of and homeschool mom friends that understand me in a special way, but my mommy-friends are SO special. Even though we are an hour apart and only see each other on average four times a year, these may be my bestest friends. Of course, A was the first person that found out I was expecting Ellie (after me!) and she also gets the first call when there's not good news. She can always make me feel better and she always offers to do anything. She called me during my first day of labor with Ellie and she was the first person that I called minutes after Ellie was born. K and I facebook each other messages a lot, but we don't talk that often. She is a little older and much more level-headed than A or myself. Just this afternoon, she called to give me some bad news about her family and I called A. When A found out that she had cancer, I immediately called K.
• I have started craving plain water again!! SO exciting! There for a while I was drinking lemon in my water, but I'm back to drinking LOTS of plain water. My friend A gave me a monogrammed cup for Christmas and I love drinking out of it!
• Maggie & Ellie have become Bath & Body Works junkies! I have quite an assortment of lotions and body sprays (every one of them gifted to me by friends) and they love to "get ready" everyday! My old favorite is Japanese Cherry Blossom (Ellie's favorite) and my newest favorite is Coconut Passionfruit (smells like the beach), a gift from my friend K. Maggie likes Be Enchanted (from A) and Cotton Blossom (from Gammy Gladys).
• Maggie is participating in a daily Bible study that our church starts at the beginning of the new year. At the end of the year they have a little reception for all the particiapnts that completed it. We usually do our study after Ellie is in bed, but she occasionally is in the room. Tonight, she grabbed the Bible and said that she would "read Maggie the lesson and teach her the word of God". Then she threw out "Moses" and "leader" and :obey" before finishing her version of a lesson.
• Maggie read Anne of Green Gables a few weeks ago. I bought the book months ago and was saving it for a time when she had finished reading some of her other chapter books. We took turns reading it aloud and she read several chapters without me. She has also read it aloud one time. She loves The Happy Hollisters, Junie B. Jones and The Hardy Boys, too. (Yes, she reads extremely well for a 5 year old!)
• Maggie has three loose teeth. I think two of her bottom teeth will be out before her sixth birthday next month. (She is excited, but I'm not sure about having a child with permanent teeth!) The other tooth is one of her two front teeth. The dentist has already prepared me that she will need some dental work. She has a really small mouth and even her baby teeth have become crowded in the past few months.
• I had thought (and hoped) that this would be the year that Maggie requested a birthday party where we invited friends. I was prepared and had several fun ideas, but she requested family again. I have and will always let her choose who comes to her party. She chose "Olivia" for the theme! This delighted me! I was worried that she would choose something really tacky (Ha!) and just so tickled with Olivia. I still haven't bought the original Olivia book for her, but I picked up one of her other favorite Olivia books today. We LOVE that pig!
• Ellie is trying to decide between Olivia and Toy Story for her birthday in June. She loves playing cowgirl with her hat, horse and boots!

And I could go on and on with more randomness, but I think I'll just go to bed!

And then two weeks passed

I had every intention of doing a better job at keeping a record of our lives, but we have been busy! The weather has been extremely warm (and even hot on some days) and we have been trying to enjoy it, so we took our first zoo trip of the year. We have been blowing lots of bubbles, drawing on the driveway with sidewalk chalk and "painting" with paintbrushes and water.

I'm trying to decide and order Maggie's supplies for second grade. I'm also planning to start a formal preschool curriculum with Ellie. Those two things alone have occupied me nearly every evening after the kids are in bed.

We went to see a production of "Charlotte's Web" with part of our homeschool group from church. We really enjoyed it! Ellie kept saying, "I want more movie". I think we'll be going to see more plays in the future.

Big Daddy took last week off of work and we took "Spring Break" from school. He had lots of school stuff to keep him busy, but it was nice to be together in the evenings.

Maggie says so many funny things to Ellie. Tonight in the bathtub Maggie complained because Ellie stuck her hand under the body wash bottle first. Maggie thinks that she should be first because she was born first. I reminded her that they were both special for different reasons. She said, "Hey, Ellie. You know I'm special because I was born in a different way? They had to cut Mommy's belly open, get me out and then sew her back up. They thought I might die. But I didn't." Of course, I was about to cry! Then she said, "Mom come show us the line where they got me out." Sweet thing just had to ruin my moment!

And that is it. There are tons of other things, but that's all I have the energy to share tonight.

Q: Why on Earth do you have a blog???

A: I have no idea. At first, it was to document a pregnancy, but I'm just not sure anymore.

I've come to realize that sometimes I act like my mom acted when I was little. Of course, I had no idea that my sister and I were nearly driving her crazy or that she loved us so much that she could burst. I didn't always realize that she was doing SO much on her own because my dad was working long hours to provide for us all.

In other words, I HAD NO IDEA HOW HARD THIS MOMMY-THING COULD BE. I also had no idea that it was worth every bit of the work, drama, tears, prayers and headaches. Oh, the headaches.

One day, I hope that Maggie and Ellie will be able to look back and know who I am right now. Writing a journal would be ideal, but blogging seems a little more realistic.

I still have my mom and I often call her when the crazy is happening and apologize for things I did in my childhood. All of my grandparents have passed away and I often wish I knew more about different parts of their lives. Anyway, I want Maggie and Ellie to have this part of who I am (and who they are, too). Crazy and everything!

I have said before that I'm not a scrapbook person, so this is it. I hope to blog a little more often, but we stay pretty busy living our lives.

Little ways that say I Love You

To say that parenting has it's ups and downs is an understatement. To say that "single"-parenting while your spouse is away for weeks at a time has it's ups and downs is even more of an understatement.

Big Daddy left on Sunday, February 12. We decided that he would leave for the airport at the same time that I left with the girls for church. We were going to take him to the airport, but then Big Daddy and I decided that it might be too much for me to try to carry two crying, kicking, heavy girls to the car after he had boarded his plane. Goodbyes to Daddy can be hard.

Maggie had her first "I just miss my Daddy" episode on Sunday night. She completely lost it when we finished our phone call with Big Daddy and then she said, "I just can't do anything without him here. I can't do anything at all without him during the day". It was like looking at myself some 14+ years ago when I would finish a Sunday night phone call with Big Daddy. I explained that I used to feel that way when we were dating, but now I had two little girls to make me feel better and explained that being apart was hard on all of us. To make matters worse, we were getting sick, too.

We stayed in all day on Monday and Maggie even asked to miss dance that evening. We were snotty and coughing and all feeling a little lethargic. At some point during the morning, I found an envelope with our street address written on it and opened it to find this:

I might have melted! I never want her to feel like Mommy can't handle things when Daddy's away, but I always want her to know that this is hard for me too. I had written her a little thank you note a couple of weeks ago because she had folded all of the towels, wash cloths and cloth napkins (nearly a full load of laundry) without me knowing. She was obviously touched and then wrote me a thank you note to thank me for the card. She loves the written word.

We woke up on Valentine's Day and Maggie was thrilled to finally give me my present. She had wrapped it (a David Crowder*Band cd) a couple of weeks ago and had been giving me hints about what it was. I opened it and then fixed the girls chocolate chip pancakes for breakfast. Ellie was playing with static cling hearts on the french doors and then spit all over the door because he heart wouldn't stick. (Yes, it sticks if you use spit!) I scolded her, she apologized and then I got the cleaner and a cloth and she cleaned up her mess. A few minutes later, I had a "delivery" in my bedroom.

And then found this on the easel in the living room.

No day would be complete without some sort of accident. On Valentine's Day, poor Ellie couldn't get her bathing suit (long story, don't judge) down in time when she went to the bathroom. You can imagine what happened. This is the note that I received:

Heart melting again.

We needed more tissues and I really needed VapoRub, so we had to go out and my mom asked us to come by her house so that she could give the girls their Valentine gifts. They each had a snowglobe in their bag. Of course, Ellie decided to put her snowglobe in her backpack once we got home and then she jumped up and down on it. Of course, it broke. Of course, Maggie wrote ANOTHER note.

The rest of our Valentine's Day was spent making homemade pizza and then delivering treats to our closest neighbors. (Both girls started out in bathing suits, but Ellie likes to change clothes A LOT. Maggie was trying on a new suit, but the bottoms were way to big, which explains why she doesn't match. Not that she normally matches!)

Lots of other stuff happened, but we'll just fast forward to this past Sunday. Maggie always has at least three art projects from her Sunday School class and this was one of them:

This is now framed and sitting out where I can see it!

There are SO many days that I feel like the worst mom and I wonder if anyone appreciates anything that I do or if they hear anything that I say. I am so thankful for these little reminders.

Do It Yourself Photo Shoot

I had every intention of taking Maggie and Ellie to have their pictures taken by a professional, but I haven't forgotten the last time we did that. After thinking about what I liked and what I wanted I just decided to do it myself with my cheap point and shoot camera...not my phone.

Ellie wore the Valentine shirt that Maggie wore once upon a time. Maggie wore a plain white t-shirt that she already had. I made both girls red hairbows and they both wore jeans. I wanted some sort of cute Valentine-y prop, but couldn't come up with anything and I was in the mood to take the pictures right then.

I like white backgrounds, so I grabbed the white comforter off of Ellie's bed and put it in the middle of the living room floor. Then I positioned Maggie (Ellie had ran to her room and locked the door) where I wanted her and I stood up and had her look at me.

Ellie wasn't as easy. I had to offer her a Tootsie Pop. Luckily, I had a red one and it looked appropriate for the "holiday". I was thrilled that she left her hairbow in and her clothes on long enough for me to snap a couple of pictures.

I cropped the pictures and then went to Picnik (so sad that they are closing) and did some changes with the color.

All three of us girls have colds, so I'm not sure what we will be doing to celebrate Valentine's Day. Big Daddy is out of town, so we may just have a little movie night.

You Are Amazing

We started out our week with a trip to IKEA on Monday. It's a two hour drive, so we talked about leaving you girls with Nana, but we wanted family time. Your dad had phone meetings, but we were able to have some nice family time.

We went to Bass Pro Shops first and you two loved playing on the boats that they had inside. You can make anywhere into your personal playground.

And Maggie, you wore one of my favorite dresses. Forget that you had slept in it from when you wore it to church on Sunday. You decided to change it up a bit and paired it with dark brown leggings and your brown cowboy boots. You looked beautiful and I wish I had taken a picture of the complete outfit. I let you pick out your clothes and I can't help but smile even when you embarrass me.

We walked just inside of the big mall and after one store, I decided that I couldn't do the big mall and IKEA with you two! Of course, we walked right by a chocolate shop and someone wanted a candy apple. That would be you, Maggie.

$10 later, we walked away with a nice dessert (caramel, covered in chocolate with a strawberry drizzle)for after lunch. And Ellie, you met a new friend.

We had Mexican food for lunch and then pulled into IKEA around 12:45. The two of you could totally live on the second floor. You jump from "room" to "room" and are just do excited to look at everything. It wasn't crowded like last time, so you had lots of space to roam.

Since we knew what we were going for, we picked out the two pieces of furniture for your rooms and I picked up a few other things. Your dad and I have looked at furniture for your rooms for so long and finally decided that this was what we want and we really couldn't be any happier. I want to get some cute antique headboards or something, but I like to look until I find exactly what I want. We were back on the road a couple of hours later.

You were both thrilled when Daddy started putting the new furniture together on Tuesday. Both of you are quite handy with a hammer and a screwdriver. You treated your dad like a king and were quick to give him any tool that he needed. The best part was that you were able to help again on Wednesday.

On Thursday, Daddy quit the work at home stuff and went back to the office. Both of you were sad, but we needed to do a little school work, go the library and get the house in order. "We" worked on Valentine stuff and were excited about our homeschool group's party in Friday.

Some of our friends from church are part of the big group now, so Ellie, you played in the toddler area with Kamrynn. The two of you had lots of fun and were so funny trying to sneak off and get into trouble with the big kids. Maggie, you loved decorating cookies, playing games and doing a cake walk. We ended the party with snacks and a puppet show.

Daddy decided that it was time for a certain five year old to get her first gun. A rifle, to be exact. I was (hoping) for something child-sized and pink, but got this instead.

A big, black Ruger.

When I asked you about it, Maggie, you said that you really like black anyway. Then you asked if we could go out and shoot at trees. Your Daddy has already taught you a lot about gun safety and you are anxious to learn how to shoot.

Now, it is Sunday. We are finally getting our first colds of the season. It started with me and I think it's moving to you Ellie. Maggie, you tucked your sister into bed, read her a story and prayed with her tonight. You two can be SO sweet and then sometimes, you're not.

But every single day, you are amazing.

These are the days

To say that things are not easy right now would be an understatement.

I homeschool.

My husband is working out of town nearly every week.

I'm with the kids all the time.

I don't have time for myself.

I can't get enough sleep.

But, these are the days.

Big Daddy was home for 36 hours. He arrived at 10pm on Friday night and left while I was at church with the girls. He slept in a little on Saturday morning and then we all just hung out in, on and around the bed for a few hours. It was nice. He did two days worth of Bible study with Maggie. (She's doing the children's challenge for reading your Bible everyday for 2012) He watched Betsy's Kindergarten Adventure with Ellie. (She LOVES Betsy!)

These are the days of mostly single parenting.

Maggie and I picked Ellie up from her class and I carried her until we were in the parking lot. Then I just couldn't carry her another step. Of course, I was carrying my purse, her bag and her art. Ellie took two steps and then she grabbed onto my leg. I dragged her a couple of steps before she let go. She would NOT get up. I put our bags in the car and went back to get her. She cried the entire 20 minute drive home and then for another 30 minutes on top of that.

These are the days of two year old tantrums.

Since Big Daddy was only home for a short time. I only completed his laundry. I washed, dried, folded or put it on hangers and then packed his bag. After that, we went out to dinner. That left three loads of laundry that had been washed and dried, but not folded or put away. I've had a headache for the past 8 days and wasn't feeling very well, but decided to force myself to fold the laundry before bed on Sunday night. As I was folding, I found that Maggie had taken it upon herself to fold all of the towels, washcloths, cloth napkins and cleaning cloths. that left me with only two loads of laundry to fold! She was already asleep, so I wrote her a thank you card and left it in her bathroom. She should get it first thing in the morning.

These are the days.

I had such a highly productive day today!!

I cleaned bathrooms, washed two loads of laundry, cleaned the kitchen counter tops with granite cleaner (Method) and purged the THREE cabinets that had Maggie & Ellie stuff in them.

Our kitchen has plenty of cabinets, so there's plenty of room for extra stuff. I have one area where most of my actual cooking supplies are and then there's an area where all of the plates and glasses are. Then there's a whole lotta other stuff every where else!

We have a counter where our laptops sit while they are charging and underneath there is what we call the "Art Cabinet". There's a large canvas bin where we put "important" art that will get thrown away when the bin is full. Maggie and Ellie also have their wooden train track and the plastic train track in that cabinet. They love to take everything out so that they can both get in there. And then they whisper!

This is now my homeschool cabinet!!! I had a drawer in my desk that was full of math manipulatives and a wooden bin next to my desk that housed homeschool curriculum that I use weekly to make our lesson plans, as well as a big binder for record-keeping and past lesson plans. Maggie and I each have a binder that we use as we do school work and then there are three or four (depending on the day) books that we use daily.

On the other side of the kitchen...

We have always called this upper cabinet the "Art Supply Cabinet". It houses puzzles, art supplies, and things that need permission before they can be taken out (pop beads, lacing beads, gluepaint). The lower cabinet had our tea set, cups and containers full of seashells and marbles that the girls love to play with. I moved all of that to the upper cabinet and put the art bin and train set in the lower cabinet.

We also had a container in the foyer coat closet with drawers that had boxes of crayons, markers, colored pencils, construction paper, plain paper and magazines for collages. I was able to move all of that to the storage bins connected to the new easel. (For me.) I'm going to put the container with drawers back into the closet with our two toy bins. I'm going to try to sort some of the smaller things (like those darn Little People) into the drawers and then label them.

Quite exciting! Things like this make me feel so accomplished and happy! And I managed to homeschool Maggie, play quite a bit of "Pet Shop" and get the cleaning taken care of. Unfortunately, there's four loads of laundry waiting to be folded and put away.

And one last look at the refrigerator:

This is only a season and one day it will be nice and clean!!

Week 2

• This is week 2 of having Big Daddy home! I think this is the first time that he has been home for two consecutive weeks since the end of July or the first part of August.
• Maggie and Ellie have already gotten used to having Daddy at home every night.
• Cousin Callie is out of school (again) on Friday, so I'm taking her and Maggie to see Beauty and the Beast. Ellie loves the movie, but we don't think that she would enjoy it in 3D since she will not wear the glasses. She'll be having a "Nana Day" and is already excited about it.
• I haven't weighed myself lately, but the diet is still going along. Today is day 18.
  
• I have felt like I was getting sick and had lots of asthma issues the past week or so.
• Maggie is thrilled that sign language classes have started back. I already miss having free Tuesdays.
• I still want a sewing machine. Bad.
• I have lots of crafty ideas in my head (and on pinterest) but really don't want to spend the money on project supplies.
• We *need* a new rug for the living room. The one I found that would be perfect is quite expensive. Big Daddy's eyes almost popped out of his head.
  
• I feel like the living, dining, kitchen and hallways of our house need to be painted. I repainted everything in our old house except for the bathroom and master bedroom when Maggie was about 2.5. Now I know why. Even though our kids are not what I would call "rough", our walls have quite a few marks at Maggie & Ellie height. I think I'll wait a couple of years since our house is not even three years old yet.
  

The Year So Far

I feel like the first week of the new year was so busy, yet so lazy. Big Daddy was out of town, so the girls and I watched a few movies in the middle of the day...while wearing our pajamas. We jumped back into schoolwork and I would say that it took most of last week to get our groove back.

My diet efforts resulted in a loss of five pounds. I am beyond thrilled! It comes from finding a plan that is restrictive, but easy to follow, I think. I sort of feel good when I deprive myself of things. At the end of the day it feels nice to know that I've stuck with my plan for another day. I still have a lot that I'd like to lose, but I am on the way.

I have started planning for Maggie's second grade year. I must say that we are moving a little faster through first grade than I want to. I want to follow Maggie's lead, but we're not moving into second grade until I'm ready too. Homeschooling is not about getting ahead for us. We only did a month of kindergarten work (which is satisfactory for our state) and that was due to the fact that she could read well, write, was very good at phonics and had completed an entire year of kindergarten math. I get excited, nervous and worried when looking at new curriculum, so we'll be sticking with what we have liked for another year.

We are slowly saying goodbye to so many "baby" things. Diapers, sippy cups and all that stuff. I thought I would be sad and while I am just a little, I am more excited about where we are and where we are going. Maggie & Ellie are at ages where they have so much fun with each other and they want to be together most of the time. It won't be this way forever, so I think we are really enjoying it.

I'm feeling the need to do some sort of family album starting with this year. I feel overwhelmed if I think about trying to dig through thousands of pictures from the past. If I start something now, I think it's still early enough in the girls' lives that it would be very special to look at as they grow up.

Happy New Year!

We have had such a happy New Year's Eve today! We had a somewhat lazy Saturday morning. I did Big Daddy's laundry and packed his bags for next week (he'll be gone again). I cooked mini burgers for lunch, we did some fun shopping and then ate Japanese food and went to red mango for frozen yogurt. We ended our day of family fun by watching Toy Story 3.

Maggie and Ellie had a hard time this week after having Big Daddy home for six whole days. They have soaked up every bit of time with him today. We had a very happy day and I can only hope that 2012 holds many more days like this.

Tomorrow will start another attempt at a better lifestyle for me. Eating better, moving more, trying to be more patient and present with the kids, being a better wife and trying to make a little more time for me. I'm going to try to take everything day by day and just try to make it through the day at hand knowing that it will make all of the tomorrows that are coming, a little bit sweeter.

For the past couple of years there has been lots of talk about choosing "one word" for the coming year. I couldn't even come up with one word last year, but it was so easy for me this year.
Patience.
I want to be more patient with Maggie, Ellie, Big Daddy and myself. Doing this will help a lot of other things fall into place.

Monday we will start a few new things in our home school and I'm really excited about that. We took a little Christmas break last week and I feel like I haven't had school in months! Of course, teachable moments are found each and every day.

Happy 2012!

Just a bunch of words

Big Daddy and I send each other multiple texts during the day. I usually end mine with a heart or some sort of smiley.

Cousin Callie writes Taylor Swift-ish love songs. Maggie writes Taylor Swift-ish love songs, but they are to or about God. It's quiet sweet. I made the decision a year or more ago to really censor what music was playing in the car. While we listened to mostly country music, (which I thought was pretty tame) I realized that a lot of the lyrics were suggestive and almost made me throw up in my mouth when they were being sung from my daughter's lips. (I tried to let her watch a country music awards show one time, but you quickly realize that can't happen when the first song was "Kiss My Country A$$".) So, we we started listening to only Contemporary Christian music in the car and the occasional children's cd. We also have a Taylor Swift cd (which I censor what songs we listen too) and a couple of Big Daddy's cd's in the car. Maggie is a big fan of Casting Crown and David Crowder Band. She loves that the songs we sing at church are also on our radio.

Lots of people don't agree with the way that we parent and think that we are too strict, but I think it has become painfully obvious that too many parents and families aren't strict enough these days. Of course, I also let my children dress like clowns more often than not. I like to think that I'm keeping the balance right.

I write love notes to my best mommy friends. Nine times out of ten, we end our messages to each other with "I Love You" or "xoxoxo". Sometimes I blush. Since Ms. A is dealing with all of the cancer-stuff, I realize how much it means to tell even your friends that you love them. I have spent more time than I can count praying for her, worrying about her and trying to explain all of this to Maggie. Maggie knows so many people that have died from cancer, so it's hard to explain that Ms. A will have treatments that will not be fun (she's going to have a stronger chemo than we thought), she will feel bad, she may look different and yes, she may be bald.

The thought of A losing her hair has been hard for us. I finally talked with her about it on Tuesday night. It's very possoble that she may lose her hair and she's taking that news very well. She's not doing well with all of the other stuff. I told her I would do anything that I could and I told her that I'd totally let her shave my head. She is a beautician, after all. She laughed and then said, "really" in the sweetest tone. And yes, I would. In a heartbeat. Maggie overheard all of this and doesn't want anyone to lose their hair. I think that may be one of her most sincere prayers now! Many times when I have heard that someone was facing a potentially life threatening illness, I would think about how it would impact their, spouse, family or me. With A being sick and especially after talking with her last night, I worry about how she feels and what she fears.

There was a mass shooting just a few miles from our church on the Sunday before last. It happened while we were in church and we only found out about it later that evening. I'll keep the details short, but a lady shot the married man that she had been having a multi-year affair with, two of her children, her son's girlfriend, and two children that had been left in her custody after their mother had passed away and then shot herself. The shootings happened at three different locations, so there was some confusion. There was only one survivor, the married man and five children between 8 and 17 were lost.

Our church is quiet large and literally center of this community and it has been the location of a candlelight vigil and counseling provided by the local school that most of the older children attended. Our pastor shared lots of details about what had been going on at church behind the scenes. None of the families involved had a church family. Some of the youth in our church coordinated the vigil and even picked out and lead the songs for the vigil. The pastor has spent time with all of the families and I can only imagine how hard that has been for him. The visitation for all of the victims will be at our church on Thursday starting in the afternoon. On Friday morning, our pastor will conducting the funeral for the six people that lost their lives and the church will be feeding their families on both days. In all of this, the saddest part for me was that none of these people were affiliated with a church. I have had lots of people say critical things because we don't go to the church that I grew up in and because we go to such a large church, but there is a big reason.

Long Story Short

I'm not sure how nearly two weeks have passed since my last post, but a lot has been going on.

I've been raking leaves, having migraines and Christmas shopping to keep me busy.

And speaking of Christmas shopping, my mom bought me that pair of boots that I was really wanting. Big Daddy has told me to buy what I want/ need. I'm thinking that I need something to wear with those boots!

I ordered Christmas cards from shutterfly and cardstore.com this year and the cards have been sitting on my desk waiting to be addressed.

My friend A found out that her cancer has returned. Needless to say, we are devastated. The doctor is hopeful that it will be zapped with one radiation treatment and chemotherapy. They have told her that she will most likely not be able to have any more children, but I haven't had the heart to ask if she'll lose her hair. (It sounds silly, but it's not when it's your best friend) I am able to hold myself together when we talk on the phone, but my heart just breaks for her.

Maggie started tying her shoes...finally. We worked on it for a while and then I decided to out it on the back burner because she would get so frustrated. Sure enough, it finally clicked and she tied them a couple of weeks ago when we were getting ready to leave for Awana. I was in the kitchen and she yelled at me from her room. She was so proud.

Ellie has a new haircut. Of course, we are probably the only ones that would notice, but in my eyes it made a big difference. She has quite a bit less hair than Maggie did at this age.

Big Daddy and I are really longing for Disney World. We talk a lot about our next rip, but it probably will not happen until next fall.

And that's it!

Hope everyone has a happy Thanksgiving!!

Mid-Week Randoms

We've had a busy start to our week, so I'm making today a lazy day! We have no place to go until church this evening, so we may even have a pajama day. I always have all these little things going through my mind and I thought I'd share them today. Things like this are always fun for me to go back and read in weeks, months or years.

• I googled "What is Pippa Middleton's job?" one day last week. It had been bothering me for months and I was relieved to finally find out where she was "commuting to" in those photos that appear on People.com where they go on and on about her style. Google it for yourself if you're curious.
  
• I have never watched The Duggars (we only have free tv) and probably never will. I don't care how many children they have because it is none of my business. Lots of people seem to think that they shouldn't have so many children when their are orphans that need parents or other couples struggling with infertility. None of that makes sense to me.
• We don't watch a lot of reality tv, because it's. not. real. I believe that Survivor was real the first season and then everyone started talking about "alliances". I prefer sitcoms and dramas. Big Daddy and I like Two Broke Girls, Rules of Engagement, The Mentalist, Hawaii Five-0 and The Big Bang Theory. (we only watch these shows if/when the kids are in bed. I also really love and look forward to Revenge! Big Daddy has been out of town every week since it has been on, so I've watched it alone, but it has been a happy place for me.
  
• I have been items to my fantasy Christmas list like crazy. I thought I would jot a few of my wishes down, but it hasn't happened. I still want a sewing machine and I saw a pair of boots at Target that were straight out of my dreams.
• About those boots...they were so pretty. I saw a pair last year that I loved and then once I tried them on they were dead to me. I "need" and want so many things that I decided not to walk over to the boots because I may love them if I tried them on. It sounds silly, but if I had them I would also want stuff to go with them and I feel like we spend so much money on things that we have to have to live. While we have plenty of money and live comfortably, I am a stay at home mom, have no income and do not like to buy frivolous things that are just for me.
• Potty training Ellie is going well. I felt like all the girls her age were trained, but now that she's pottying I realize there are lots of girls older than her that are still in diapers. I am all about following the child's lead and I think Ellie was ready.
• Ellie has a cold today. That means that Maggie and I will probably have it by the weekend and we had an extra-special Saturday planned that I'll probably have to cancel. I will remain hopeful until the weekend, though.
• I feel sorry for Kris Humphries. I haven't really followed the whole Kim Kardashian/Kris Humphries thing, but I check People.com daily (guilty pleasure). I don't think the whole wedding was orchestrated for publicity or income, but I think they might have gotten caught up in everything. I had a small, private wedding and would not have wanted to cancel it beforehand. I can only imagine the pressure that they felt to go through when it was a multi-million dollar production and was being filmed for tv. I think marriage should be taken seriously and I'm not so sure that girl knows how to do that. I hope they both find happiness.
• I'm one of those people that hopes that everyone else is happy. I
  
• We had Big Daddy home for four days and then he left this morning and will hopefully be back next Wednesday. We picked him up at the airport this past Friday evening and Ellie was almost arrested by the TSA. If you give Ellie a line and tell her not to cross it, she will.
• After my post last week declaring that things were going well without our fearless leader, things fell apart. Big time. There are so many times during the day that I just want to say "EPIC FAIL" and hit a restart button.
• I pray daily for patience that surpasses all understanding and sanity.
• I keep thinking about how much less-stressed I would be if Maggie went to school everyday.
  
• Everyday I am thankful to be homeschooling Maggie.
• Ellie is hilarious and sweet and has such a kind heart. She also likes to pull Maggie's hair, but usually it's in self defense.
  

The New Normal

I'm trying so hard to get into our routine, but I admit, I am struggling.

We have been homeschooling since July, but changed to first grade curriculum and I had to adjust. Then it was time for Awana, dance and Maggie's homeschool elective class to start. Once you mix all of that with Big Daddy's heavy season of travel, you have one worn out mommy!

Things are going fairly well without Big Daddy at home during the week. He has traveled 7 of the past 9 weeks, but one of those weeks we were in Disney World, so he was traveling with us. Maggie and Ellie usually cry for him at bedtime and Ellie cries for him if she gets in trouble. We went shopping with my mom on Monday and Ellie freaked out and started screaming for him when I got out of her sight. It's hard on all of us.

Big Daddy and I had a little date night this past Saturday. It had been a pretty good while since we had been out for dinner and a movie. We went to see "Courageous" (I cannot recommend it enough- especially for men) and then had Japanese food and walked around a little. It was a much-needed break. Maggie & Ellie stayed with my sister and played with Callie and put on make up!

I went shopping on Monday with my mom and the kids. I'm happy to report that nearly all of my shopping for the kids is complete!! We were able to split up so that I could get a few things without them seeing. There's one thing on Maggie's list that I couldn't get and I still need a couple of things for Ellie. I am very pleased with my progress!

My sister, brother-in-law, nephew and Cousin Callie came over to trick or treat in our neighborhood on Monday evening. We seem to live in THE place for trick or treating. Thankfully, our hose is in a new subdivision at the end of the street and our house is the last one on the street and we kept our lights off and no one came by! I was NOT going to open the door to strangers in costumes when I was the only parent at home. The girls all had fun and we got a small amount of candy.

Other than that, things have been as busy as usual!

Busy is my new normal.

I want, I want, I want!!!

I'm in one of those moods where I can think of a million relatively small things that I want! These are the days that before I had kids I would have treated myself to a little shopping trip. I started making a list in my head because my wants covered so many different things from paint to a new (Missoni) scarf.

Blessed as I am, I have a free gift coming tomorrow. He should be here shortly after Ellie's nap and Maggie's school and free is always good.

I'm looking forward to the cooler weather that is coming our way for the weekend (Hello, Fall!) and hoping that Big Daddy has a peaceful re-entry back into the family. He is way behind on homework and will probably have a few work-related projects that he'll be addressing over the weekend, but he'll be upstairs!! We're praying that he arrives safely and on time!

Today is the eleventh anniversary of the day that Big Daddy and I said "I do".

The first thing that comes to mind when I say that, is why in the world did my parents let me get married when I was so young!?! Now, when I think of someone getting married at the age of 22, I just think they are babies. Babies. Of course, my parents had no issues with me getting married, but my goodness that sounds SO young now that I'm eleven years older. It took quite a while of living an hour away and being married before I stopped wondering (in the back of my mind) why they didn't call to see where I was. It was because I was a married adult. Silly me.

I have no pictures to share of the big day because I'm not going upstairs to turn on the desk top and find the file where I scanned a few pictures in. I don't even have a single wedding picture displayed in the house.

One of the things that I found out recently is that you think a certain day is so special until the next special day comes along. I wasn't sad at all to say goodbye to Maggie's preschool days because something bigger and better always seems to be around the corner. I feel the same way about wedding days.

When I think back on the past eleven years, our wedding day was just the beginning and doesn't seem that important at all. All of the decisions and fights and trips and fun times and babies that we've had since then seem so much more important. (Although I do think that eleven years of being married is a pretty big deal!)

My sister asked to keep the kids so that Big Daddy and I could do something fun together. So far, we'll be eating dinner (I have no idea what) and cleaning out the garage while they are having a sleepover. It doesn't sound like fun, but it will be nice to do it without children helping. On Saturday morning we may take his new kayak (Father's Day & anniversary gift) out to the lake, but we haven't decided yet. We are with the children nearly all of the time, so doing even the most mundane thing without them can seem pretty neat!