I had to say this to Maggie the other day: "Putting out someone's light doesn't make yours shine any brighter".
She isn't overly confident, but she often hears from authority figures (teachers) that she's a good listener, follows directions well or cleans up every single time she's asked to (school only). She has started to realize that this is a good thing and that not all children do as they are told (at school again). This blows her mind! She wouldn't dream of NOT doing what Ms. Brownfield asks. Lately, I have realized that she brags on herself as we are eating lunch after preschool and takes pleasure in all the wrong that the other children do. Needless to say, I am working with her on this.
I have really felt like this year of preschool is so much like the big, bad world. We have had to deal with competition, and "no, she's my best friend" and "but I wanted to sit beside of her" and the worst one, "I don't even like your ____ or think it looks like a _____" or "I think your ___ is ugly". (The last two refer to creative arts.)
It has broken my heart. And at times, Maggie's too.
One of the things that really makes me feel sad is that it seems to be a problem mainly with the girls. I have felt like I knew exactly where the term "mean girls" came from this preschool year. They are critical of clothes, favorite colors, favorite friends and how they write or draw or color a picture. I've had to tell Maggie a thousand times that it doesn't really matter what other people think and that everyone doesn't like the same, colors, foods or friends.
I thought we had a couple of more years before this started.
My question is: When does this get easier???
3 days ago
4 comments:
I'm not there yet in age and no girl in the family (yet?) so I can't answer your question. The thing I never realized or thought about pre-motherhood is the mommyhood competition. I hate it! Whose child mastered this first, whose child is the cutest, whose child gets the best grades, whose child is the best athlete, whose child can color inside the lines, whose child is the teacher's favorite....it never stops and is my least favorite about being a mom. A lot of moms are just grown up mean girls and that is why I am not a part of a mom group.
BTW, I think I just answered your question. It never really ends.
Wow! I thought we all had more time before that stuff starts! Wow. I'm sorry. That is a lot to go through at such a young age! I'm not sure it will get easier.
Sorry my friend, it doesn't get easier. :( And it really really hurts when you have to sit back and watch your baby girl get hurt by her "friends" and you can't really do anything, but pray she'll be okay and will get through it. Raise them to be strong, confident young ladies and they will be okay. :)
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